Ah, the age of Modern times. Want a habit to break in 2020? If so continue reading because I’m sure that you do this too.
We have to stop ending our sentences with LOL.
I was talking to a friend the other day. Explaining to her why I’m so frustrated, she’s a fellow HoH mom and she understood where I’m coming from. She listened to me vent. Here’s the thing… I ended almost every sentence with LOL. I wasn’t laughing. If you ask my husband, I was fuming. I was pissed, and rightfully so. How could an infant go from not hearing as normal, consistently, to passing magically as ‘normal’. I was not laughing, but at the end of each sentence I wrote LOL.
Why? Why did I do this? I was in the presence of someone who truly understood where I was coming from and why I felt the way I do.
We’re all unsure of ourselves.
That’s it. That’s the reason you end your sentences with LOL. We’re entirely unsure of ourselves, even when we’re in good company. We’re unsure of how that person will react. We’re unsure of how that person will view us after what we’ve said.
I knew my friend wouldn’t judge me for the things I was saying, I knew my cousin wouldn’t judge me when we talked about our twins. Yet, I was still unsure of myself, uneasy if you will.
Break The Habit.
It’s 2020 ya’ll. It’s time to cut the shit. Start being sure of yourself. Start saying what you want to say without the fear of reaction. Instead, embrace the reaction. If it’s negative, address it. If it’s positive, enjoy it. And if it needs to be talked about more, then do it! You live once, do you want to continuously live in fear of what others will think of you? Or, do you want to live authentically?
Hey Mama, I know how you’re feeling. You’re probably just like me. You feel stuck under the weight of your family, you feel like you do everything for everyone. You know you do nothing for yourself and to be perfectly honest, you’re fed up with it. This blog post is for you.
Unless you’ve been a mom (adoptive, foster, etc included), you just don’t get it. The problems we have aren’t truly problems. Instead, those problems are babies, toddlers, children and big kids all tugging in their own direction because they know they’re safe with us. It’s not a problem because we’ve adapted, we’ve survived whether they are one day old or eight-teen years old, we’ve survived. And, if we did it right, so did they! The problem is the way we’ve adapted. We’ve been taught by years and years of influencing that mom’s are last. We eat last. We bathe last. We care about ourselves, last. You’re nodding your head in agreeance here, aren’t you?
Since we know we’re last, we must be creative in our ways of “growing”. I’ve found a few ways to fit personal growth into my day, sometimes in just five minutes! I want to share these tips with you, my fellow mom. Why? Mostly so we don’t kill anybody, but also because we all deserve to water our own flowers and let them bloom!
So, You Only Have 5 Minutes.
Baby stop screaming for just a minute? Oh, he’s been sleeping for five minutes? Let’s get you some quality YOU time.
#1 – Warm your cold coffee and sip away. Take this time to reflect on how your morning went. What could have gone better? What can you do to make the day better?
#2 – Have a journal? Jot down your thoughts. Was the baby overwhelming today? Are you working towards a specific goal? How are you doing on sleep?
#3 – Phone-A-Friend. It’s hard not having any adult interaction! Feeling like you need a quick chat? Phone a friend and say hello! Most likely, they need the call just as much as you do.
#4 – Step outside for some sun. Have you been outside today? If not, step outside. Let the sun warm your face, close your eyes and take a deep breath. If you’re like me and live in the country, enjoy the silence. It’s a beautiful thing.
#5 – Eat! Quick, while you can, grab a snack! Are you hiding the Girl Scout cookies from your family? Go grab one and enjoy it. Want a healthier option? You go girl, eat that apple! You don’t have to share with anyone.
#6 – Rejuvenate your skin with a quick wash-off face mask. Close the bathroom door, start the shower for some steam and enjoy your live-in mini-spa. When the five minutes is up, wash it off and go about your day.
#8 – Listen to a Podcast. There are hundreds of podcasts available! If you have an iPhone, head over to the podcast app. If you have Spotify account, you have access to several hundreds of quality podcasts. Find your niche and press play!
#9 – Pick up around the home. Something bothering you around the home, take five minutes and focus on just one thing. Tidy up and you may feel instantly better.
#10 – Just sit. Yeah, I said it. Self-care includes relaxation. May you browse Facebook, scroll through Pinterest or envision yourself successful .
I have more than five minutes.
Say what?! If you have more than five minutes to yourself a day, you can certainly expand on any of the above tips or you can dive into more.
What’s helped me the most when I have more than five minutes is to plan out my day. I use a physical planner to record what’s for dinner, my daily workout, my work schedule and so much more. It’s been really helpful in holding myself accountable. Heck, this whole blog post was planned out.
At the end of the day, the only thing we want for you is to win. Whether that means vegging out, or building yourself up.
(This blog contains affiliate links. See my disclosure regarding affiliate links here.)
2020 – The Year of Growth! Are you on your own journey of personal growth? I sure am. 2019 was a difficult year for me, not worse than 2017 but still difficult. I put myself last in many ways and I still do, but 2020 is my year of growth.
One way I’m growing is by reading. My goal for 2020 is to read a book every month. Whether the book is fiction, self-help, self-development or simply for fun I want to read! I loved reading as a kid and getting back to reading is not only nostalgic but, great for developing minds.
When speaking of growth, I personally favor self-development books. What are self-development books, you ask? Simply put, this type of book forces you to develop a habit or trait. Take Rachel Hollis’ book, Girl, Wash Your Face: Stop Believing the Lies about Who You Are So You Can Become Who You Were Meant to Be. I’ve read this book and couldn’t put it down! The author was inspirational, funny and most of all relatable. That’s what every self-development needs, a relatable state to the reader. If you are unable to relate you are unable to grow. In this book, Rachel Hollis’ states that she is not asking you to change your life, instead she’s encouraging you to change yourself. More so, she provides witty banter to your excuses because she’s had them too.
Self-development caters to many different people. To the single mom, to the stay at home mom, to the leaders in the workplace, to the entrepreneurs and so much more, there is a book for just about every one.
So why are self-development books so important for personal growth? Most self-development books are able to challenge your mindset. Challenging your mindset, creating habits and altering your traits are all able to cultivate growth. Furthermore, there are several workbooks, journals and guides that are able to direct you towards growth.
Here is a list of a few books I recommend:
Each book is under $20 and available via Kindle/Audible! I can’t explain how important growth is. You are never going to be ‘perfect’ but you can grow and develop into the person you want to be. The books above this can help you tremendously when you are ready to grow!